Friday, 28 September 2012

28th September 2012

So I got very very drunk and decided that I should probably read some more mail, answer some more questions and put out another update. God damn it! When will I learn?!

I have had feelings for a work colleague for a long time and I have so far failed to get over her. I knew that nothing could happen between us and in the likely event she would reject me I would have felt nothing but awkwardness. We got along very well and I didn't want to jeopardise a good friendship. Now she has left our workplace and I feel awful just knowing that I won't see her again as she has moved far away as well. Before I attempted asking someone else out at work in an effort to get over her who declined and now goes out with another work colleague making me feel even worse. I know it is cliché but I can't fathom having feelings for anyone else, at least not for a little while. To be honest I think I just need reassuring that I will not feel this way for too long so I don't know if I am wasting your time but nonetheless thank you in advance. 

Yeah…About that…! I’d love to tell you this feeling will pass, but when I got swore in as an agony uncle I had to take a vow to always be honest.
So I’m afraid you’ll never stop feeling this way, so break out the hard liquor, Linkin Park and Razor blades and stop wasting my time so I can help some people who there is actually still some hope for.


My ex of so many years ago is still in my network of friends. Even though we are both married to separate and wonderful people, I still feel a strong attraction to himsemicolon and enjoy his company whenever I travel to his town. We have solid "platonic" relationship but he fills my thoughts and dreams. I am married to a wonderful man who loves me, thinks the world of me and who I am in love with. What can I do to get over my ex. Should I discuss with my husband and get this off my chest?

When will you people learn?! Threesome.


Hello. Last Saturday around 4:33 A.M. I get a call from a friend inviting me to this weird house party at our friends house, used to these sort of invitations I agree and quickly get dressed and set out into the early hours of the morning to party. When I knock on the door this guy whom I've never seen before answers it, at the time I was slightly afraid because this was my best friend's house and he's always answered his door. Anyways, me and this stranger start up a conversation and before you know it we're bonding and talking about each other and it seems to be really hitting off. Many hours after that we suddenly start kissing and I completely stop, telling him repeatedly that I will not go any further because I'm tired of having sex with guys and see them leave the next day, as if nothing happened. This guy just shrugged his shoulders, held my hand and hugged me, wherever we went that day he just held my hand, and after spending 17 hours by each others' side we agree to meeting up again, despite my pessimism. I see him on Tuesday and again he's cute, understanding and funny, he then says he wants to see me Thursday, which is tomorrow. I don't know if it's too early to tell, but I really like this guy and I want this to lead to something. I'm tired of sleeping with guys whom I wont see in 3 months or 3 days for that matter, I don't want to feel dirty and grotty after a one-night stand ever again, how can I not mess this up? How should I handle this situation? I want to trust him but previous relationships have left me scarred and trust comes at a great cost for me. I've never spent time with someone who makes me feel so special, and the chemistry is AMAZING, I honestly don't know how this happened and so quickly as well. Help!? Thanks. :c

This asshole! He is playing the old ‘nice guy’ gambit, and pretending to be a decent guy to get into your panties. I know that thjis is the case and that he’s not a genuinely nice guy, because there is no such things as a genuinely nice guy. All we ever want is sex.
Hell the only reason I’m telling you all this is so that you’ll be impressed by my honesty and so thankful for the advice that you’ll want to sleep with me.


I have been with my boyfriend for 7 and a half years. It has always been long distance. He is a great great guy. We both love each other. I recently got a great job offer in my home town.I spoke to my boyfriend about it. He is not from my home town and he is reluctant to move all the way to my home town. He has a temporary job in his home area, theres no security. I really want to be with him. We want to settle down, but cant decide where. Should i not accept the job and give up my current one,hoping to secure work near him or should i just move to my home town and take the job?I really cannot continue this long distance thing. We need to start our life together properly.He is thinking about moving for me but i want him to be honest. I dont want him to resent me in a few years when he regrets the decision. That would not work. Also there is no guarantee of him securing work in my area. I really do not know what to do. After 7 and a half years i know him. I love him and dont want to lose him. He feels the same.

I think you're being more than a little selfish. You can't expect him to move down to live with you. How is he possibly meant to explain that to his wife and two children? And even if you give up this excellent opportunity and look for work nearer to him, do you have any idea how much harder that would make it for him to keep you and his family secret from each other? You're clearly not thinking this through.


I finally thought id met someone that loved me and that I loved. Im 45, my son is my only relative and to meet someone like S, well I couldn't believe it,I was wary at first but the longer we spent together the more I believed and I can honestly say I was truly happy after many years alone (bad experience with childs father) I fell in love and it was wonderful.
We talked about our future together and planned.

In june he said he would move in with me, in july he said it would have to be december, in august he said that he wouldn't be able to sell the house he had with his ex, they'd been separated over a year, that they would have to trade it in on a new house and get another mortgage together, I was surprised but kinda understood. A couple of days later I spoke to him,I just wanted a bit of reassurance over the matter, I knew he was stressed,he told me he didn't need the pressure and dumped me.
Theres been no communication,he doesn't reply, and I lost my friend and lover, my fears came true.
I just need some advice, I miss him so much, everywhere I go I have memories, and I feel so alone, if I do go out to a party or something, and ive really forced myself, I stay for a bit and slip off, because I feel different,separate, im meant to go to a friends party saturday people are so excited but I am dreading it especially since I've said people can I stay I will want to go at 11,party will go on till very late, im feeling very stressed and dont want to be a downer. Dont know what to do.

There is a simple plan to solve all your problems: Go to the party, get blind stinking drunk and sleep with some random guy, or if you’re really drunk/adventurous girl. Ta-dah! You went to the party and got over your ex in one fell swoop.


As far as Mum is concerned, her partner has stopped drinking because it was stopping him from sleeping at night.

Last night, while I was in my bedroom, I could here him fairly often coming into the kitchen, pouring something (I can't be certain it was alcohol) then I could here him keep putting something in a cupboard, then washing the glass out. 
I once went into the lounge & found him drinking out of mug. Knowing him, that's probably alcohol.
I wouldn't say he's an alcoholic, but every time they go out, he'd come back paralytic.
While it doesn't bother me what he does, I just don't want my mum taken for a mug.
I don't know what to do.
Please help.

You first need to confirm your suspicions, so I suggest setting up a hidden camera in your kitchen somewhere. Oh course if all my recent experiences with found footage movies is anything to go by this will probably lead to your entire family getting terrorised and eventually killed, conveniently all in the oddly specific spot that means it is all caught on camera. But hey, the truth always comes at a price, right?


I really dont no what to do, im 18 years old had the whole world in front of me and was doing really well at school etc, then all of a sudden i started talking to an old flame who to be honest isnt good news, i fell pregnant to him while he was serving 6 months in prison, i really like him but i just feel like now he's out he doesn't want to spend any time with me, he's constantly with his friends smoking weed and getting up to no good. He got a job when he came out but now he's not working atm, hes started drug dealing and i feel so depressed. My family are going through a hard time aswell as my older brother has been diagnosed with cancer. I feel so pushed out from everything as i have so many stresses, i want to be happy and all im feeling at the minute is down and lifeless. I have no money, no job and i feel so guilty about being pregnant, i don't want my baby to be brought into the world with nothing. I don't even feel like i'm welcome at my own home, they just don't seem interested if i'm ok- i can understand why their main concern would be my brother but i don't think it means i should be treated differently. I really need help- i can't live like this anymore. I've thought about leaving my boyfriend for our baby's sake, but hes threatened me with killing his-self, hes tried to do it before and i wouldn't put it past him if i leave him.

I fail to see your problem. If you leave him you’ll not only be getting a good start froor you and your baby, but potentially be doing the gene pool a favour as well. Just hurry up and leave the piece of shit, already.


Hi!  I am a secondary school student, and I think I got really puzzled of love.

Although I am quite popular among other classmates, no one got interesting on me.  I know I'm not good-looking but I kind of like a girl that wasn't the same class,but same form.  I didn't got familiar to her,we got Facebook chatting and whatsapp, but I think she'll never like me.  Other boys that the criterion are better than me like her too, I can't stop loving her, I know I can't be with her but I can't give up! Should I really tell her what I think, or Give up?  Please give me some advice!
Sincerely, Ronnie

Hey, Ronnie.
You’re friends are right. You should just keep your mouth shut, stick to your facebook stalking and hope she posts some pictures of herself in a bikini after her next holiday so that you at least have something to get you through the many many lonely nights with only your right hand for company that your future inevitably holds.


 I am in a relationship and consequently in love with the boy in question. However, I've been best friends with this OTHER boy for 4 years and now there's an inkling of attraction. I don't know what to do. The guilt is killing me. Please don't tell me to evaluate my options because I've tried doing that and it doesn't work. I feel like I might cheat even though I don't want to. 

Awww, fuck! Bella is torn between two men?!  This is normally where I’d make a ‘twilight’ joke, but between all the '50 Shades Of Grey' jokes I’ve been making lately this site’s traffic already consists of, like, 97% desperate, horny, bored housewives...Actually, in hindsight that may not be such a bad thing. Ladies my number is ...

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